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Monday, February 11, 2008

Product Review: 'Go-Green Cloth Bag'


Product Review - by The Doctor

Do you have stuff?

I do.

Most everyone I know does too.

Do you ever need to carry that stuff? Well, here you go then:

For this product review I'm going to tell you about some killer

stuff that you need to carry around all your other cool stuff.

It’s the exclusive! (whoo-hoo!)

‘Go Green Flying Cat Cloth Bag'

Now hold on there! I know what you’re thinking!....You're thinking ;

"Hey! I can go down to the local Wal-Mart at midnight and buy cute little Chinese cloth bags for 12 cents a dozen, right?

So like, why buy this one, huh?"

Ah! Good question! But first, we should talk about why you are even in Wal-Mart at midnight in the first place. Because certainly by now you must realize that

1.) You stand a good chance of running into Britney Spears and her posse, and

2.) That when you DO buy those Wal-Mart bags, several things automatically happen:

First, 68 cents goes directly to an giant-evil corporation in China, and thus at that very same moment 18 American workers are cruelly laid off. These once proud workers now go into debt using their credit cards to buy Pabst Blue Ribbon and Big-screen TV’s.

Then, banks and collection agencies get hired, along with teams of lawyers, to recoup some of the remaining money, which is of course pointless, since we all know credit cards don’t actually have to be paid back! (Of course the lawyers get paid no matter what.)

Meanwhile, the evil giant mega-corp in China, all excited at the huge profits they just made from you, order another giant tanker full of really cheap flimsy bags to be shipped to the USA, which crashes on a sandbar just off the Jersey shore, releasing 650,000 gallons of crude oil into the Ocean. Of course no one in New Jersey notices, but nevertheless the EPA must now spend several millions of dollars to clean it up. But before that can happen, congress must form an investigative sub-committee, to the tune of 65 million dollars, which makes them cranky so they vote themselves another raise -costing all of the rest of us a quick 25 million.

So-A hundred million bucks and a bunch of good American jobs!

And all because you wanted to selfishly save a few pennies!.

Well Mr. [or Ms. ]Smarty-Pants!.... Proud of yourself now?

Hmm?

Well....O.K., look, I MAY have fudged those numbers just a wee bit, but you get the idea.

What I'm really trying to say is that on top of all their other great qualities, these bags are American-Made!.... And worth it!

These things are HUGE, first off.

We take two of these grocery shopping and can easily get 2 weeks of food into them. And heres the neat bit; they are made out of extra tough, sort of denim-like material, and put together strong, so theres never any danger of rips and watching your stuff go flying all over Piggly-Wiggly.

In addition, the straps are extra long and that really helps believe me, because instead of trying to hang it off your shoulder and then having it slide down onto your arm, (making you look like Gladys Kravitz on her way to bingo night), you can actually put these on your shoulder and they stay there!

But the really cool thing is the artwork. There is, on both sides, a really wacky Green flying cat- grinning away with nice friendly letters below reminding others to ‘Go Green!’

VERY unique. We get comments all the time when we use these!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



The GO GREEN Bag
Go Green Tote Shopping Bag


Here's your ultimate shopping bag
with the Go Green Flying Cat (an exclusive all original design just for Wings of Love) on both sides of the bag. Large handles makes this bag easy to swing on your shoulders. Carrying groceries has never been easy and you still have 2 hands free to open the car door. Handles are 14" high. Machine washable. Made in the USA.
Size: 18" x 14" x 6"

WOL-5001 $17.95
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To sum up; these will last you the rest of your life, they carry as much as a '73 Pontiac station wagon, and they have some reeeeally bitchin’ original artwork, by an artist who was herself, so they tell me, also made in the USA.

So please go check it out now at http://www.wingsoflove.com

Till next time- hugs!

Sunday, January 20, 2008

New Age - Wings Of Love

Is Yoga for dogs anti-God ?

As I was searching the net for a copy of ‘The Cat Art of War’, I got cosmically lucky, because I happened to notice an interesting little article. And, as I often do, I happened to read the response to said article.

First, a warning!

BEWARE! If you are easily offended, I mean reeeaally easily offended, do not read this. Stop reading right now! Because if you are one of those types, you will take it personally. And since I don’t even know you, that would be silly. Yes?

To start, I like Yoga. Always have. Heck, I’m a Cat for petes sake! We invented it! Oh, I know, you’re sitting there thinking apes-I mean-people came up with it.

Maybe......but only after watching Cats!

But honestly, since I read this article and its ‘response’ I have been in fear..In Fear! I tell you! For the very future of Yoga! Because I am told that these kind of 'people' are everywhere!

The article was apparently a simple reporting of an animal shelter up in Washington state. And once in a while in this shelter, they practice yoga...........For Dogs.


Look, Zeena Warrior Princess is not a species-ist! Hey...dogs are fine, in my book. As long as they stay outside……and keep the barking to a minimum….and don’t slobber! Eeew!

Follow those simple rules, we’re cool.

Anyway, being the mellow-nature-kitty that I am, I suppose the occasional mutt can get some good from Yoga. I mean of course they can’t do any of the really technical stuff or anything, jeeez- they’re not Cats after all! But still, I don't see any big problem with it.

But this lady does. Big time.

And it was her response to this innocent little missive that is...well,kind of....unbelievable.
And very, very scary.

The response? Well, read for yourself;

“I just saw this article and I am a little bit peeved. The reporter thinks it's VERY CUTE for dogs to be taking yoga - but this is a serious issue that people just don't seem to understand!

Well, o.k.- doesn’t like it, No biggie. She doesn’t think it’s cute. Fine.

After all, doesn’t seem like a real big prob, huh? So somebody-oh, I don’t know- could be Lindsay Lohan- wants to take Piddles in to have his chakra re-aligned, where’s the harm, right?

Ah, but then she continues;

"I know that people like their dogs and I love my Heinz 57 mutt Cubbie but for heavens sake God-loving people do not take their dogs to yoga or go to yoga themselves because yoga to put it politely is anti-God. Things might be different in Seattle, but here in Pahrump there is no doggie yoga."!!

AHA! You of the human-faiths! There it is!

Yoga..is antiGod!!! Gasp!....I..I think I may faint!... It’s quite simply, an ....Abomination!.... Heathens!

Now stop right there you!- Stop laughing at the name Pahrump and missing the point entirely.

(Note: Now, no ones making fun of Pahrump here! Besides being the home of radio personality Art Bell, one of the many other fine points of Pahrump, Nevada, according to their official website, is this:

‘Former farming land is being developed into housing at the highest rate in the state!’

So take THAT Seattle!- Ed.)

AArrgg! I HATE when the editors interrupt! Anyway....

The human-gal continues;

"Yoga originated with a blatantly anti-Christian philosophy, and that philosophy has not changed. It teaches one to focus on oneself instead of on the one true God. It encourages its participants to seek the answers to life's difficult questions within their own conscience instead of in the Word of God."

Oh! I see! Hmmm…so...Yoga is...the work of the Devil!!!

I must say I had not heard that before!

I have heard that at its core Yoga is committed to such things as peace, harmony, and a respect for nature.

I also know that some people refer to Yoga as a religion, but I really didn’t see anywhere in the article claiming anyone was trying to convert the little Daschunds and Shar Pei-Boxer mixes away from….umm….well, I guess this lady assumes these dogs were all Catholics. Or maybe Lutheran.

I mean, Jeepers! How dare someone try to bring peace and health into their (dogs) lives, by “focusing on oneself”! The very nerve!

And then this nice lady ends-don’t they always?- with a ‘quote’ from the Holy Bible. (I am assuming here that this is the same Holy Bible the rest
of us know about....)

"It also leaves one open to deception from God's enemy, who searches for victims that he can turn away from God (1 Peter 5:8)."

So I looked up that quote. I think she may have taken some teensy literary liberties there, but heck, look who’s writing this article! So I wont 'throw stones!'..ha ha ha he...ooh..sorry.

Actually, the quote I found goes like this:

‘Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.’

(Oooh! Roaring Lions! I guess they had a big problem with Lions back in those days. Roaring ones anyway.)

Well, that quote seems somewhat different from what this lady had written, I think. Just a bit. A smidgen.

I never could find the exact quote this woman was talking about, but I am assured by Dr. Strangelove (our fantastic reviewer) that it in fact refers to the disciple Peter teaching the chosen of the evils of not only Yoga, but Pilates, sweatbands, and the Suzanne Sommers Thigh-Master.

(But I should mention here that the editors have told me that I am not to listen to anything the Doctor tells me, so I am not too sure about that.)

I must admit to being unaware of any mention of Yoga in the Bible, but this lady is from Pahrump, so she must be pretty 'up' on this sort of thing. (Art Bell, remember?)

And the lesson here? Well, if you are inclined to heed this womans words- then By Golly Be Careful! -If you and your puppies must do the ‘down dog’,then...Do it for God! Yes! For God, apple pie, and the destruction of the American Farmland!

Yep-thats it.

And those are your words of wisdom from Zeena Mighty Warrior Princess
for this day!

Now, when those crazy editors and I can come to an agreement on this whole work vs. sleep/tuna schedule thing, I will return to grace you with my wondrous presence, and mystify and amaze all with more of my fabulously wise words!